Right Act / Wrong Arena

Are You doing the “right act” in the “wrong arena”?

This is a great question that a dear friend of mine asked me years ago, long before I was trafficking in energy work, while I was still in broadcasting. It stopped me in the moment and pulled me up short, by bringing me back to the present.

It’s another way to take care of Your Self and deepen your practice.

I was in the throes of a waning romance, sobbing about all I had done that was “right”, meaningful, and full of heart. She agreed with me all the way down the line. Yes, I’d opened my heart, taken the chance and been very caring to and with this man.  And yet ……… the relationship was not only waning but falling apart as I frantically tried to shore it up.

Then she asked the question and it all became heartbreakingly clear to me. 

I was indeed giving my “all” which wasn’t having the impact that I’d hoped for and even planned on. Why not? There was something that could not be overcome. At the time, I didn’t have the word for it. Knowing what I know now, it was dissonance. Energetically, we were on two distinct and very different vibrational levels—not in harmony, as it were. That’s all.

Ultimately, it wasn’t about I gave more, he gave less, I wanted too much, he needed distance— you know the reasons we excavate when we’re struggling mightily to explain a deep hurt or disappointment. However, if we’re willing to look at it differently, right act/ wrong arena can take the sting out of many situations.

Yes, we all have backstories and paths that have brought us to this moment—baggage that we carry with us, wounds that we continue to tend. That’s a given in any situation. Make room for all of that and then check to see if you’re in harmony with the music of the moment.

Another way to unload this is to consider that you and the other person in the moment are speaking two different languages, what someone I know calls “that French / Greek thing”. They are both viable ways to communicate—only if both people in the conversation share a common language.

The way I remind My Self of this? “Shakespeare doesn’t play well at a rodeo”. They’re both viable forms of entertainment and trying to combine the two probably won’t make for a very satisfying experience.

When you find Your Self not making much headway:

Stop.

Breathe.

Is this a moment of right act / wrong arena?

If so, adjust accordingly— 

—which might mean changing your energy or approach, redirecting the other person’s energy, bringing Your Self into neutrality, or even leaving the situation. There are any number of responses you might access.

The bottom line is to  be aware of dissonance. When it is present, heads up! Charging along on your current course won’t help the situation or change it. Coming into resonance one way or another is the best course of action.

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